I fancy myself a photographer. I had my own business a couple of years ago, but since our move I've not done as much shooting as I'd like. I've gotten very insecure about my abilities and taken on a day job to try and forget about what the one thing I really do love. This idea to reinvent myself has backfired; I'm a photographer. It's what I love and it's the one thing I've been pretty good at. So the other night my husband and I sat down at discussed an action plan to get my career back on track. We don't have the finances to invest in the advertising like I really need, so I'm going to have to rely on a lot of word-of-mouth referrals. In order to do that, it's networking time. In order to network, it's time to cut prices and even do a lot of free work. I actually don't mind free work if it's on a project I've designed, so I needed and idea and I came up with one.

Last night I was at a local venue pitching this idea to a girlfriend of mine who I'd ideally like to model for me. She's insanely pretty, 24, 5'5, maybe 110 pounds, light brown hair and blue eyes. Her parents adopted her from Russia when she's was a baby; I adore her. She's never modeled before, but she has the perfect look and great style...I need her!

So like I said, I'm pitching the idea to my girlfriend and this guy overhears and he comes over to introduce himself. His name is James, 25, over 6', very muscular, dirty blonde hair and hazel eyes. Very striking. He talks to me about how he's been trying to break into modeling, but he hasn't known what direction to go and who to contact. We discuss my project and how I could definitely see him fitting in and some ideas that I have for him. James is really nice, not cocky - seems genuinely interested in getting started. He introduces me and my girlfriend to a couple of his buddies he's with and we all enjoy the evening having beers and chatting.

About an hour or so into our time with James and his friends, my friend Chris's band went on so my girlfriend and I said we were going to move closer so we could see them. James and his friends came with...all very cool guys, so we didn't mind. We ended up grabbing a stand up table, splitting a couple of pitchers of beers and dancing a bit together.

It's last call and I'm out with my girl dancing and I feel someone come up behind me and start dancing. Thinking it James' friend Mike, I lean back and wrap my arm around his neck. Whoops, it's James. Oh well, we've all been drinking, and he did come up to me, so whatever. My girl and I are dancing rather provocatively with him and he's enjoying it and as the song ends, she squeezes my hand and walks off. I'm ready to follow her when James takes my hand and walks me back to the table. Okay, no biggie.

We stay til close, all of us laughing and having a nice night out. My friend Chris comes over with his girlfriend and hangs out a bit. Really a good night. James and my girl have asked a few questions about the modeling project, so I'm excited about getting it going, but mostly I'm excited about this new group of people I've met. I'm noticing James is flirty, but nothing too bad. All of his friends are with both my girl and I, but I write it off.

As we leave I said I was walking my friend to her car and then I'd go to mine since I was parked a couple of blocks past her. James offered to walk both of us since the beach crowd is starting to come back and it can be shady. We got to her car, he gave her a hug and kiss on the cheek and she was on her way. As we left for my car he had more modeling questions, so we stood at my car and discussed the project more. I expressed to him that I was excited he was on board and he said he was too. While we were at my car, I pulled up my portfolio on my phone so he could see more of my work and of course he saw that I shoot nudes.

"You took these," he asked.

I nodded, "It's not a big deal."

"You've done men and women."

"...and couples. Really, it's not that big a deal. It's just work. I get paid to take pictures."

I knew what was coming

"So, some of these guys, you've never done anything with them? There are some good looking dudes in here. Naked."

I nervously laughed. What do you say to this? Because the truth is, yes, I have slept with a couple of my models. One was a planned thing. I did two shoots with him, the second one I set out to fuck him by the end of the shoot...and I did. He was a player and the whole second shoot was like foreplay; I can't explain it. We both knew what we were getting into for the second one...it was an excuse to fuck, plain and simple. The other two we became good friends and it just happened. None of those models were paying clients either...just want that to be known.

I just shook my head.

"You have! Which ones? Come on you have to tell me."

"No...it's not like that. They were friends that modeled for me. I don't want it to sound like some skeevey abuse of power, it wasn't."

"They? So it was more than one! I'm intrigued."

I'm so embarrassed. "Look, you don't have to work with me. I can promise you I am completely professional. I have a ton of great references from both men and women. I'm really good at what I do and I think you'd be perfect for this, but if you've changed your mind, I understand."

"What? I'm giving you a hard time. Shit happens. You're a sexy woman and I can imagine that most of these guys had thoughts about you. I'm going to do this, we're going to have fun...and maybe we'll have more fun than we initially thought."

I'm positive I was already moist, but I'm just straight up wet now. I give him a smile and say, "we'll see."

"We will."

We exchange numbers and he gives me a hug a kiss on the cheek. I get in my car and leave. This morning I wake up to a text saying "glad I met you last night. We're gonna have fun. It's up to you as to how much we have." I need to hurry up and schedule his shoot.